Another week another revelation by a devoutly religious person that gay people do all they can to throw the world and their fellow heterosexuals into mayhem. This time the openly gay pop star Sir Elton was discovered to have secret relation with the devil and as such he will only bring havoc to the brave heterosexuals of Russia.
But thanks to Vladimir Putin also known as the advocate of free speech and the legislation recently enacted by him there may be legal ground to stop Sir Elton from trashing Russia should the calls by Imam Lutfullin (who had also discovered Sir Elton’s unusual relationship) to boycott Sir Elton’s performances fail.
Meanwhile people back home in England urge Transport for London to present Sir Elton with an Oyster card for free so that the musician can act as a deterrent to Islamic terrorists. The alternative plan of putting bacon, ham or other porcine products on underground trains has quickly been dismissed as it was feared to London students who no longer can afford food in their student union may start snacking on the welcome food.